OMG BELLA LOOK AT HIS BUT IT IS SO BIG!
by JenneyFox247
Summary: nothing to do with title funny alice and jasper and bella and eddie story RLY funny
1. Chapter 1

I DONT OWN TWILIGHT! this is to my freind LEXI AKA CARLY! love ya girlee!

I was saying goodbyes to my loving family and Jasper. I would miss them dearly, as soon as we got in the car we heard

"SURPRISE!" and jasper and Alice came out from there hiding places.

"We fooled you! Didn't wa!" Jenney said

I looked at Edward and whispered "did you know about this?"

"No and I was just informed; Jasper what the hell are you doing here?"

He panicked for a second and then it got really calm

"No Jasper don't mess with me!" I said

"Fine Alice wanted to accompany you" WOW Aly was thrown under the bus she was mad.

"JASPER YOUR SPOSE TO TAKE THE BLAME LIKE A LOVING HUSBAND!"

"I hate to ruin you 'love fest but' WHAT ARE YOU DOING ON OUR VACATION TO GET AWAY FROM YOU??"

He sighed then looked at my sister. I sighed to. "Fine you can come"

"YAY!!" Alice yelled

I sighed as the boys got the luggage. I love my sister don't get me wrong but she can he overbearing. As we got on the jet Jen was everywhere jasper was reading and Edward was holding my hand. 'How can someone so small be so annoying' I thought. Edward giggled.

"Whoa dude you did not just giggle!" jasper said we ignored him and eventually he started reading again. That's when Jenney sat on his lap and whispered something in his ear he smiled and they ran off. I sighed and I didn't want to know what they were doing I turned my attention back to Edward big mistake his face looked like he just saw a ghost and he's already pale as a vampire! I kissed him and he snapped out of it.

When we arrived Jasper had a big grin on his face and so did my sister sigh 'it better not be like this the whole trip!' we got to the house and it was about midnight sigh what to do I wish I could sleep. Alice was outside communicating with some animal Jasper was hunting (Alice is very strict about her animal friends) with a deep breath I joined Ali she was talking to the dolphin GREAT! When I walked up to the dock she looked like she just realized something

"HEY WATCHOUT!" I saw this giant claw mark in the board.

"Aly? How did this get here??"

Alice POV

Well I was blowing this Popsicle stand! This was boring; I was going to go use my gift! I went out to the dock I saw a giant claw mark 'hmm I thought jasper was going to have to fix this' I thought as I leaped gracefully I sent out a wave of echolocation and a dolphin showed up my gift was cheesy! I mean I remind myself of dolphin woman. Sigh oh well it was cool it was telling me that something was here 20 minutes before we got here. I was panicking I needed to find Jasper fast then I heard footsteps ahBella!

"What was that??"

"I think wolves are here" I whispered she froze

"Go get Edward ill find jazz"

We split up I was thinking while I was wondering ' wow me and Lexi make a great team!' then I smelt Jazz. As I turned the corner I saw the bimbo playing with a tiger. I tapped my foot; he stopped, and turned around.

"Uhh hey darlin' what's up?" he asked as the tiger tackled him. I sighed and thought 'I have to do everything!' then jumped and broke its neck and it died quickly Jasper looked sad, do I started to feel sad.

"JASPER!" I yelled he looked alarmed "I need to show you something Edward and Bella already know and we need you there."

"Why am I always the last to know these things?"He said I giggled then took his hand

Before he left he picked up a flower and gave it to me. Sometimes he was the sweetest and others he was annoying! I explained everything to him while we were running so he was informed when we got there. He ruined the moment by saying

"Crap, I left the tiger!" I sighed and we walked in Jasper felt the tension I guess because I rush of peace came over us again.

J pov

Well now we had a problem there were werewolves here GREAT! Well I guess its ok I just have to watch Jenney; she can be ehhh very feisty. See Lexi isn't but hey where's the fun it that! Well I will fight till the end limb by lim-

"Jasper WTF?" Edward said right forgot he was a mind reader for a second.

I sighed and got back to admiring Jenney. She gave me a creped out look which turned into a love look, and kissed me on the cheek.

B POV

Even I have to admit that Jasper can be strangely very cute at time. Edward must have picked up what I was thinking and gave me a look that said 'Jassper? Cute? Are we still talking about the real Jassper here?' then he started tickling me

"Edward STOPPPP HA-Sto-HAHA"

"What? Did you say?" he asked with a smirk I looked at Aly who looked like she was going to faint. Poor Aly. After I told Edward to stop; we decided not to worry any longer Aly and Jazz went to go find Jaspers tiger when they said that I gave Eddie a look and he whispered

"You don't want to know" and I giggled

He and I watched a movie. Twilight of course and when the opening song was on not 1 minute later Aly was at the door.

"HEY! You're watching it without me?" she said with a puppy dog face

"Well I didn't know if you wanted to watch it but if you do you-"

"DUH! One minute let me get Jazzy… JASPER GET YOUR ASSPER IN HERE... he's coming" she said with a grin.

Sigh never get to have alone time with my Eddie Bear. The look on Ally's face looked like she saw right through me. As Jazz walked in I said

"Well it's about time spazper!" Everyone laughed sigh I love my family……and Spazper.

The next day

"BELLA WHERES MY POPCORN?" Alice yelled I honestly don't get her sometimes I sighed and looked at her.

"Aly… you don't eat popcorn!" I said and shook my head and laughed

"Humph fine ill call jazzy and he will pick me up something!" I sighed ITS NO USE ANYMORE! I walked out not before hearing

"What do you mean by 'you can't'?" I giggled and when off to find Edward.

A POV

Is it too much to ask for service I was watching the 4 seasons of the O.C that Jazzy got me for my b-day. Bella won't get me popcorn cause she says "I can't eat it" p-s-h forget her I though. I will call jazzypoo!! He picked up

"Hey"

"Jazzy?"

"Yes baby" he used the drawl in his voice talk about "stranger danger!"

"Can you pick me up a tiger" hmm never thought I would say that

He paused I imagined he was running his hand through his hair and sighed. "Honey I can't I'm sorry."

"What do you mean you can't?" I said "You're capable!"

He sighed and said he had to go.

"FINE!" I yelled in the phone. Wow I was being dramatic but hey where's the fun in having a normal life! I sighed and went in the garage I wanted to take my little bug out it hit 300 mph now that Rose pimped out. It wasn't there! "WHERE'S MY BABY!" I cried as I sunk to the floor. Right then Jasper came in and said "I'm right here!" I sighed "jazzy?" "Yes?" "Can you carry me in the house?" I said my feet dangling and my arms stretched out. He sighed and smiled "You are sooo spoiled"

At home

I was happy to be home I missed Emmy my big brother he was awesome. I missed my mom too since I really don't remember anything Jasper has always been there for me. He said I was always like this but I don't believe him. My daddy has always been my favorite in the family he understands and we do lots of thing together. But my favorite sister is Lexi she has always been my friend when I woke up from being changed I woke up next to her we were best friends ever since. Now I really want to go to the Teen Choice awards Jasper and Eddie said it's a bad idea I took that as merely a suggestion; Emmy said have fun Rose glared, and Lexi is coming with me daddy and mom said it was fine and they would get us VIP seating.

"EKKKKK!" we screamed

"Wait!" I said "We don't have anything to wear!!!"

"Not again" Bella said

"No we need to look good! We will go shopping in LA ok?"

She nodded I was so happy I was bouncing all around. When we got there the airport was HUGE! I brought my air book so I could web talk to Jasper who was NOT a happy camper right now. We already hunted so we should be good for like 2 weeks and we're only here for one week so SHOP-IT-UP!

Bella POV

Sigh LA I was in love with this place but we didn't have a house here we had a house in Beverly Hills. As we took her yellow Ferrari mine was at the house so we could go our separate ways to find a dress and stuff only rule was it had to be cute and if she didn't approve I count buy it I agreed dresses was NOT my thing. We got to the house and our hair was messy she HAD to put the top down at 100 mph!

"Wow I love our house" we smiled and walked in…. it was quiet to quiet then I heard a scream "ALICE!" I yelled

A POV

Ah home at last I missed my baby the wind in my hair Lexi was enjoying it to I think! As we got in the house I sighed contently and walked to the master bedroom I wanted to stay in there as I looked on the bed I saw the last thing I wanted to see for the next week I screamed. "BELLA" I yelled and looked at him lying on the bed laughing "JASPER WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" Bella came in and gasped "Jasper?" "Yes it is I Jasper and Eddies here somewhere." Me and Bella stared at each other there was only one thing to do!

J POV

"Dude I can't believe you talked me into this there pissed off at us!" Edward said we got kicked out of the house and booted into the guest house well she will come crawling back to me not really she will kick my ass if she knew what I did!

Jen POV

"BELLA WHERES MY CREDIT CARDS" I said as I was going insane looking for them. "OMG you don't think I left them at the-jasper! That fag!" she laughed and when to get Eddie so they could 'take a drive' while I talked to Jasper. I walked into the pool house and found the idiot in a Speedo ready to get in the pool 'stranger danger'.

"Jazzy can you go put some clothes on" I asked nicely he did of course I wrapped my arms around his stomach and breathed in his scent ah so calming it smelt like sea grass. 'Focus!' the voice said 'right'.

"Jazzy?" I said cutely he looked at me "yes?" he asked "Where are my credit cards?" I asked while stroking his chest and gently kissed his lips. "In my pocket of my jeans" I kissed him again and left him speechless. "Oh and thanks Jazzy!"

Jazz POV

The little voice in my head was saying 'dude you just got played by your fiancée!' I was speechless I can't believe it! I sighed Edward was home he must of heard what Jenney was thinking. He looked at me "dude you need WILL POWER!" he said I tried to punch him and he dodged it then chuckled.

Bella POV

Well Bella got her way shocker so that means were set to go shopping! We split up she went to go to LA and I when to go to a smaller more less people Beverly Hills shopping mall she frowned upon my choice but hey! What's a girl to do, I sighed and put the roof of my cherry red convertible up I did not need my hair messed up I have no idea how Jen survives cause she has long hair but her hair looks good messy it's like a mahogany red color its beautiful my hair is just brown with red highlights! I had no idea what I was even thinking about wearing nothing yellow or Jen would kill me I was thinking like a reddish brownish dress with a cute bow "I know" I said out loud "I will go to Betsey Johnson!" I said and speeded down the road.

Aly POV

I speed away from the house, I think I'll hit the main then go through all the shops "OH I think they have a flirt here!" I said excitedly. When I got there I looked at the rack there was a beautiful yellow sparkly ruffled dress and it was a size 0! Ekkkk! I ran but someone beat me some weird person with black hair. OH NO SHE DIDN'T JUST TAKE THAT DRESS FROM ME "um excuse me I had that dress first!" she looked at me and smiled and walked away UGH what a first class bitch! So I made a phone call.

"Hello?" the voice said

"Jazz, some girl just stole this dress from me!" he chuckled

"Hun, you know that's going to happen more right-" just then the girl came out and said "here you can have it" of course she didn't have the body for it! I said bye and hung up with Jazzy. I bought the best dress in the world and it looked amazing on me. I sighed contently in my car and sped off to my house. 'Ya know what' I thought 'I think I'll call Lexi!' I waited the phone rang 2 times.

"Hello"

"Hey Lexi find a dress yet?"

"Uhh yea, I bought it"

"WHAT I TOLD YOU TO SEND ME A PICTURE BEFORE! IT BETTER BE CUTE BELL!" I yelled and hung up. I sighed and continued driving.

B POV

Well I so didn't need that! She was in a bad mood 'what did Jasper do this time!' I thought and laughed I got it the car and started driving and Diva came on I started giggling this was so her song

Stop the track, let me state facts  
I told you give me a minute and I'll be right back  
Fifty million round the world  
and they said that I couldn't get it

I done got so sick and filthy with Benji's, I can't spend  
how you gone be talkin' shit?  
You act like I just got up in it  
been the number one diva in this game for a minute

I know you read the paper  
the one that they call a queen  
every radio round the world know me  
'Cause that's where I be

So much attitude, before I knew it I was home I pulled out my blue dress and I saw Jens car the dress still in it I sighed and picked it up I ran upstairs and put it in her closet. Then I heard "JASPER WHERES MY DRESS!" I yelled back "hey diva it's up here!" she laughed and ran up "hey where's your dress?" "Right there" "OMG it's so pretty!" we were such girlie girls as we giggled together. Best friends forever!

Day of the Teen Choice Awards

Jen was freaking out getting nails done; make up; check; dress check she was turning into Esme! She did my make up as in lip gloss, mascara, blush, and eye shadow. I was excited and Jasper was watching Jen his expression was highly amused and Jens eyes were dancing with excitement.

Aly POV

There was so much to do; to plan I bet Edward I could get a date with Jackson Rathbone. I so could! It was time! I was going insane as we pulled up in my yellow Ferrari. All eyes were on us as the people parked our car I love Carlisle! He got us red carpet walks and celeb seating! As soon as I got to my seat I saw Jackson Rathbone looking at me curiously I waved and he smiled. I also saw Rob Patterson looking at Bella. When I looked again Jackson was walking over I asked Bella to leave for a second she looked and rolled her eyes and walked away. "Uh hey" I heard the cutest voice I smiled "Hey" then the awards started he was about to leave when I grabbed his hand "stay" I whispered he did I thought 'hey I could get Zac Effron if I kept this up!' I giggled and looked at the Jonas Brothers on the screen. Jackson was wondering if I wanted to go up with him to get his award I agreed 'this should be interesting!' Lexi gave me a stare she must of heard she must be going up to her eyes were dancing with humor I hope Jasper watches this! When they called his name he stood up and took my hand. He walked up there and they were howling and whistling and we laughed together. He said his speech and walked off I was so happy at that moment I would get lectured when we got home!

L POV

HAHAHA that was hilarious I could already hear Jazz yelling! Goodness Rob asked me if I wanted to go up but I disagreed kindly. "Jen, Jazz is going to be mad at you!" she sighed and looked at J.R the awards was over and they said their goodbye and left. When we got home we went inside Jasper was already there eyes dark with hate. 'OH CRAP!' I though as Eddie pulled my out of the middle ' I don't think I want to hear this!'


	2. LOOK!

OK guys please reviuee!!! should i make more than one chapter????? say yes or no if there are more yes's then i will :)


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